| shaking off covers while we sleep. |
[05 Jan 2009|09:05pm] |
cross and cross between. dangerous ground treads under feet, weak and quiet. silent to the noise of clamour and wails for friendships thrown away. tossed away and coughed away, trying to pretend they never existed. when thoughts and memories seem fake, and truth seems skewed. caught in queues in places where ownership is questioned. fingers quiver, lips shakes with halted 'sorrys' barred behind gritted teeth. swallow faith and discard hope, there is no need. and the words stop with heartbeats increasing in speed. fear and fear alone drives and pain, passenger with the sinister smile. with the theory corrected, execution flawed in practice. we're twisted, some more than others. but the chains allow for little variance and movement is watched. we're all mistaken. i more than others. have faltered. i do repent. however the barred behind gritted teeth 'sorry' release in fear, falls on deaf ears. forgiveness is not necessary. one does not seek it. but seek the star second to the right in the darkness. where the wolves how on rooftops and eagles die and phoenixes rise. short of flame and time stands at the cross roads. leave little behind.
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| you know it. |
[03 Jul 2007|05:46pm] |
John Salvor Kotsakis

leave him comment love please. It'll mean the world to him.
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| no subject needed. but yes, you're reading this anyway |
[10 Mar 2007|06:44pm] |
FOB. melbourne concert. 7th of march 2007
flash, flash, flash photography never fit so well. 5 o'clock anticipation turned into 6:30 banging on the doors. I wrote my username on my arm. couldn't find anyone. Thriller soundcheck got everyone high. we were ready to bang down some doors. ran back to the merchandise line more than enough times. every kid is a fancy kid. i can prove it with a shirt now. wearing three layers of clothing and 2 shades of sweat. excitement took hold. holding brother's FOB t-shirt while putting on my own clandestine shirt over already bought FOB t-shirt, the lights dimmed and screams echoed until a twenty dollar bill flashed in my face. "Food-drinks-anything..." he went to work at 5am just to take me to the concert. sometimes i wonder how my concert buddy, or 25 year old brother puts up with me.
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| if you're out there, tell me |
[25 Feb 2007|10:29pm] |
ok, no one can see my updates on their flist. at all. none of my updates on their friends list no one. so I'm hanging really loosely on this thread here. do I keep updating my journal. but the people, my friends. the people I care about and the people who I want to share my life with can't see it. What's the point, Someone tell me how to fix this! TELL ME HOW TO FIX THIS!!! or i'll just give up and stop writing forever...
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| Pete Wentz Picspam . UNCOMPLETE |
[24 Feb 2007|10:09pm] |
Pete Wentz My hero on so many levels Agree with him or forget you ever thought about him. Either way, he inspires me and keeps me alive. Without him and his thoughts in this world, I've got a feeling I woulnd't be around. Take that what ever way you want. But he shows me how to be strong.
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[20 Feb 2007|07:19am] |
when life's given up on everything but making your own a bit more miserable than normal, what do you do?
seriously, give me answers.
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| Mikey Way Picspam |
[30 Jan 2007|12:10pm] |
l
Watching MCR last night and getting to stare at Mikey my ultimate musician in a perfectly handsome box I thought I'd make a picspam. Because I love Mikey to absolute peices and you should too! A mix of old and new Mikey, But I love him either way! You talented man!
Here we go..
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[30 Jan 2007|09:53am] |
My Chemical Romance. Where do I begin. From the start? Ok will do.
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[11 Jan 2007|06:55pm] |
Ok, today it's my life straight up without any poetic composition. I'm ready to let everything go and start a new. Make everythinf different. make my entire life different. I want to see things differently instead of through the blinders that I'm apparently wearing.
I never knew how cheap I was until yesterday. I can't afford a haircut, so I spent, lets say about an hour in front of the mirror cutting my own hair, the fringe looks good the front section.. hahah layers. the back.. ohh yes we can say I gave up. I tired of the crypticness of my journals today so yes, its the straight up idiotic, depthless me.
hey pattybear!! hey broken_not_fine .. oh and hey kassafrasss hopefully patty sees that cause she told me once that she has filters and that she can't always see dedications otherwise I'll just let her know and that I waved -waves-
yes this is getting very random, but hey its my life, who ever said that anyones life is planned out, written down and followed like a squedual. that'll just get to tiring. life is built upon the spontanious adventures that we encounter and create each day, its the risks that make us grow and the leaps and bounds we take that help us learn. without stepping into a new world you'll ever trully know what you lived in.
I have so much more to say, so much more to vent out and so much more to yell through this keyboard. but I realized what would that do? Course I can let out all my frustration into this blog but what happens after that, it still isn't solved it still isn't made better, it's still around. simple as that.
so if you've read this far, leave a comment tell me how to gain inspiration back and one suggestion to do tomorrow, anything at all from baking cookies to skinny dipping.. and if I do it, a very special post will be dedicated to you
MUSIC;; BABY COME ON ACOUSTIC - +44 MOOD;; UNISPIRED AND NEEDING NEW LIGHT TODAYS WISH;; FOR SOMEONE TO TELL ME HOW TO DREAM AGAIN
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